Lyrics: Eddie "Hi There" Lowther

Arrangement: Casey B

Album: Needs More Wanger

Eddie "Hi There" Lowther wrote these lyrics on April 17 2003, basing them in part on IRS and State of Maryland regulations concerning the distribution of liquor. Casey B then recorded them a week later. This recording was included on Interrobang Cartel's first CD, Needs More Wanger.

Its title sometimes appears in all caps and sometimes with only the first letter capitalized, and sometimes with a final ':' and other times without. In the original post containing its lyrics the title was given as 'COMAR:'.


"A!" A quote Supplier will be licensed
or a dealer or wholesaler
of a brand of wine or distiller
of spirits
or just a seller to a dealer
or wholesaler here in MARYLAND
(Instrumental solo - Accordian)
"Bee!" If Mr. S got to change licensed wholesaler or franchiser
to sell some kind of wine or something that is finer
He's gotta give thirty days.
(Gotta give thirty days)
Of notice of this intention
(Gotta give thirty days?)
Registered mail!
(Gotta give, gotta give)
To Alchohol and Tobacco Tax Unit!
If you, Mr. C. discontinue sale of wine
(Or gotta quit something finer)
Give the man 30 days again
(But gotta mention new supplier)
Indeedy Section "D" (Please sample Ben Stein for this line. Only)
If they say that thirty down
is crushing you in town
Comptroller comptroller comptroller.
Proof of spirits - put writing
don't get lawyers - no fighting!
Circumstances warrant - potato fluid not for lighting!
"Eeeeeee!" (fade to...)
...affected by the procedure set forth in this regulation
which is in the outgoing wholesaler's inventory on vacation.
On or before the conclusion of this notice period
shall be purchased and paid for by the supplier or incoming wholesaler
at the laid-in cost of the out-going wholesaler
before the in-coming wholesaler is allowed to distribute the product
in the Maryland market.
(deep breath)
If a supplier, other than the current brand owner or authorized agent,
acquires a brand and wants to designate a wholesaler other than the existing wholesaler,
the supplier may not file the brand under Regulation .05 of this chapter,
until the supplier or incoming wholesaler has purchased the inventory of the outgoing
wholesaler at the laid-in cost of the outgoing wholesaler.
"Section F & G" Ignore those rules if they don't apply!